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Interview with I Can Lick Any SOB In The House
By: Patrick Steven Patterson
 As strange weather moved into
middle Tennessee, I turned the seemingly unflappable I Can
Lick Any Sonofabitch In The House frontman Mike D. onto
the news of a potential tornado that I had heard about on
the way
to our conversation.
Before we could start the interview, he
had to have someone pop open a laptop to check the
weather status. It appears the only things that spook this
former soldier and aspiring prizefighter (and current single
father) are plane flights and severe weather. It sure as hell
isn't George W. Bush, Charlton Heston or the Religious
Right.
Lightning burst and thunder cracked in the background while
we discussed the craft of songwriting and bar rock; record
labels, booking agents and management; as well as
Evangelicals, The First Amendment and foreign wars - with
Mike D occasionally looking over his left shoulder, out the
window into the impending Nashville weather
apocalypse.
NowOnTour: So, you're Michael Dean Damron,
singer/songwriter.
Mike D.: Yeah.
And also frontman for I Can Lick Any Son Of A
Bitch In The House.
Yes, sir.
What's the difference?
None. I use my whole name just to differentiate the solo
record from the band's stuff so that I could tour more - so
when the band couldn't go out, I could go out by myself,
that's all.
But I still sell Son Of A Bitch records [on tour] 'cause I still
play the same songs, just with an acoustic guitar.
So, the material translates both
ways?
It was written on acoustic guitar...I think all good songs
should translate both [ways]. Just think of Springsteens, or
whoever, those guys, they can fly no matter what.
Is sure seems that you've been though a lot in
your years, quite a storied life. You're not going to run out of
material to write about anytime soon are
you?
Well, no. Maybe it'll change. Maybe it'll be more uplifting. I
don't know.
Runnin' out of stuff, no. I still live with it. Crap - from a long
time ago. Some people let it go, I guess I haven't figured
out how to let it go.
But it's got to be cathartic to let it out on
stage.
It's healing definitely. It's freeing.
So you're gonna end up with 30 records or
something unless you start writing 'Shiny Happy
People'...
I'm in a bit of a slump right now, but we've got a new record
we're gonna start working on in April and it's being produced
by this fella named Gerald Collier from Austin. He was in a
band called Best Kissers In The World and he played with
the Supersuckers for a while. He's friends with Eddie
[Spaghetti] and he's gonna give me a little hand with writing
some of the new stuff.
I gave him nine songs already - which are all pretty good
songs - just so he can give me a little more of a palate to
paint from, a little more color.
Do you collaborate frequently?
No, I've never collaborated with anyone.
It's a huge thing here in Nashville, everybody
writes with everyone else...
It's a Machine. I don't know, it's all scary to me.
I've lived here [in Nashville] for four years now
and it seems to me that all the bands are cover bands. All
the pop-country artists, at least. There are some great
artists out there, I mean, Brad Paisley is a hell of a guitar
player - and he's a writer, too. But there is also the 'Ken
Doll' that you put out in front of the songs...
Yeah, you can't serve two masters. You get to be this pop
superstar or you get to be real. I always planned on being
John Lee Hooker, being an old man playing in and old little
shitty bar.
I love me some 'bar rock.' And that's what I think
I'm going to be hit with tonight - although I'm not sure that's
a 'real' genre - but I grew up not liking Southern Rock, yet
they both have similar edges.
To me it's more...this Southern...bar...blues.... Genre-fying
it. To me it's all about the '70's and the big guitars. To me,
Thin Lizzy is as just as valid as Lynyrd Skynyrd even though
they sound completely different, it comes from that same
place, as far as I'm concerned.
I don't understand Nashville, I don't understand new
country, I don't understand a lot of things, but it doesn't
resonate in me; so Nashville is just another place to play
rock n roll.
I've found plenty of places to see rock n roll
here.
Yeah, absolutely. There's got to be a strong music
community outside of the main...just like in LA, there's
pockets of cats, underground, that are just sick.
This comedian, Damon Wayans, said, quite a while
ago about Public Enemy: "Those brothers aren't looking for
any airplay. 'We're gonna take this shit underground.'" I
think
you have the same kind of mentality?
Well, it makes more sense. If you sit and look for the
mainstream to come and give you a million dollars, that ain't
gonna happen, but if you're looking for a career, if you have
a strong work ethic, you can be your own salvation, you can
do your own thing.
Call it 'underground' if you will.... 'Underground' seems
almost elitist, like you're 'better than.' It's just doing your
own thing.
But it also has to do with content, though. You're
not looking for any Top 40 radio spins anytime
soon?
It could happen. I'm just learning how to write songs. I've
only been writing songs for five years, since this band's
inception and I don't think I could write [a Top 40 song] if I
tried. I write too much from the first person. I haven't
figured out the finer points of songwriting. I couldn't do it if I
wanted to. I'll stick with the crap that comes out, 'cause it
makes sense to me.
What's up with In Music We Trust? I remember the
label from my days at a record store, years ago. That's
when I became familiar. Is it a label, 'Zine, collection of
music geeks like us?
It's our label. There are 30 or 40 releases on it. Some really
strong bands, too. I guess [you'd call us] the 'figurehead' of
it 'cause we tour more than most of the bands on
it.
It's done by a guy named Alex Steininger. He was a kid
when he started it, he was 16 and it was a 'Zine, and now
he's 24, so he's been around music business stuff a long
time and he's got his shit dialed in. He runs it right and he
takes
care of us. It's a great label and I don't care to go anywhere
else.
I've always gotten the question, "How do I get
signed." But the smarter question, to me right now, is 'How
do I get a booking agent?' Do you have a booking
agent?
Yeah. 'Cause in the first year of the band, I did everything
myself, which was fucking nuts, and that's why I chose such
a big, stupid name. Because when that rolls across a guy's
desk, booking a club, he's not just going to throw that in the
garbage. He's going to give it a second look.
It was very successful for us, so I got booked in better types
of venues, [venue talent buyers thinking] 'Oh, that's
interesting.' Then they heard it and it sold itself. But the first
year was rough.
When we did get our booking agent I was so
grateful...because you don't just get one, they've got to want
you too. You can hire...I know there are tons of booking
agents out there...that are half-assed, and you hire them
and they put you in little F-grade clubs, D-grade clubs. They
don't look out for you - they just put you out there, playing
shitty places for nobody.
But In Music We Trust also serves as our publicist, so that's
crucial. Even more so than a booking agent. You can still
book yourself, but I think having a publicist is crucial, so that
people know who the hell you are when you come to the
town for the first time.
Thinking 'stepping stones,' I think touring is the
best thing you can do. Build a local following, then a
regional, etc. Is the next logical step looking for
management or looking for legal representation, looking for
a booking agent...
Management is huge. We just finally got a legitimate
manager. We've never had a manager, we did it ourselves. I
think in order to go somewhere else, you have to have
somebody that's already connected and can talk to other
people.
Our guy, personally, he's getting us endorsements, like
strings, getting us crap you need day-to-day on the road. He
got us a European booking agent. He's not trying to get us
on Conan O'Brien - who knows that might work,
too.
A lot of people...'Hey, this is my manager...' and it's just
some friend. And that's another realm - I didn't understand
that until we started dealing with this guy. Somebody who
knows what they're doing.
It's a foot in the door, because it's so often about
connections in the industry...
It's about making friends, but you can do that on your own,
too. A lot of people start out with the right idea: 'We'll get in
a van, go on tour.' But you have to know how to conduct
yourself with people and genuinely give a fuck about people.
You sit down and talk to someone, talk to 'em, don't...this
schmoozing shit, it's for the birds....
That's how you get to know people. That's how you get to,
'Well, I've booked these guys. Hey that's a good fellow.' Plus
if your band's great, on top of that, shit just falls into place.
Before you know it, shit's hitting on all cylinders and you're
playing great gigs, the money's getting better.
So we're in the Bible Belt...you're not looking to be
elected to the Religious Right's Board Of Directors anytime
soon, are you?
That's why the world is in such a mess. Religion. 'My god is
bigger than your god.' Everybody looking for the
apocalypse. Evangelicals. It's just as crazy as fanatical
Islam.
Did I read that you were Mormon for a...
I was Mormon when I was a kid because my family life was
so fucked up, and I found solace in that. And also when I
stopped doing drugs - in my early twenties - I stopped doing
speed. It was a good thing for that year I needed it. Then I
found a lot of holes, like I can find in most religions...or as
most people can.
It's whatever gets you through the night. I honestly
believe...I've got no beefs with anybody's beliefs...because
this human condition is a bitch. So, whatever gets you
through the night...beautiful. Just don't put that shit on me.
Because I think it's okay to be gay, it's okay for people to
choose whether you want to have a baby or not, if you're a
woman.
I respect everyone's beliefs. I don't care. Fucking [Ku Klux
Klansmen], I'll listen to you, that's the First Amendment. As
long as you aren't putting your hands on me, as long as you
aren't putting your hands on someone else, you have the
right to say whatever you want, believe in whatever god you
want...
Until it becomes harassment...
Absolutely, absolutely. But, don't stand outside the abortion
clinic, calling some 16-year-old girl - who got knocked up by
some asshole - saying she's a murderer. She's not a
murderer.
She's just a kid with issues.
Yeah, she's a kid.
And I don't have the answers. I just wish folks would live
and let live. Leave people alone over in the Middle East.
They've got a whole different set of values and beliefs. If
they want democracy, they're gonna stand up and take
democracy. You can't force-feed that to
someone.
You've been doing the music thing for a long time,
maybe fifteen years...
Longer than that. Started playing in bands when I was 13,
14, something like that. But on a professional
level/semi-professional level, yeah, about 15
years.
I've been in other bands...some successful, some not so
successful - or if I haven't been doing that, I've been doing
production. I do lighting, stagehand shit...or...I work in a bar
- I see 50 bands a week, every week.
What bar do you work at?
Dante's. That's my bar. I've been living in the basement - in
the green room - for the last six weeks. It's my
home.
How would you measure success. Is it when do you
know you've made a difference?
When I strap that fucking guitar on every night. That's
success. When I write a song that moves me, or moves
someone else - somebody else gets something else out of it
and expresses that to me - that's success.
When you get up and take a crap in the morning, that's
success...
Whatever gets you through the night...
Living your life. And making the crowd feel good about the
show they just saw. That's success. Living is
success.
Instead of intelligent, thoughtful questions, how
about these:
What's playing in the van now?
I don't have an iPod and I don't have shit.
A lot of AM radio?
No, no, no, no, no. [The band all] have iPods. So I've got to
listen to their crap. Whoever is driving has got control over
the [music], so my drummer [FlapJack Texas] likes Husker
Du, early indie rock stuff, which I don't particularly care for.
Husker Du is fine, but.... The bass player, Mole [Harris],
when he drives at night, he listens to psychobilly and...and
weird shit.
My harp player, he got me Bob Dylan's first album, so I've
got this CD player that I can listen to Bob Dylan on
anytime.
Beatles or Zeppelin?
Zeppelin
Marlboro or Camel?
Camel.... Lights
Beer: Domestic or Import?
Pabst
Vodka or Whiskey?
Whiskey
Chicken or Fish?
Chicken
Cracker Barrel of Waffle House?
Fuck Cracker Barrel, man. Waffle House.
So, is the band primed to beat my ass into the floor
tonight?
Yeah.
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